Author Archives: Pam Teschner

2 birds. 2 stories. 2 truths.

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I had two encounters with birds last week. One very close and personal. Walking into Walgreens, minding my own business, a starling swooped down and hit me in the right shoulder blade in a flurry of wings, tiny claws and deep throated squawks. It felt like a scene out of the Hitchcock movie, The Birds. I hurried into the store hoping it wouldn’t follow me. The whole scene was replayed a few moments later on another unsuspecting woman entering the store. The clerk said that it was a recurring issue in the spring when the starlings build their nests near the building. Apparently, they’ve been known to wait in the parking lot to attack the unsuspecting getting in and out of their cars. That’s pretty sinister.

My other encounter was much more pleasant. Running along the canal for my morning jog, I heard a chorus of gentle clucking and peeping coming from the water. As I came around the corner, I saw a mama duck clucking and four peeping fluff balls paddling close behind and beside her. She clucked at her newly hatched ducklings to keep them close and safe. The ducklings instinctively followed the sound of her voice and stuck close peeping in response. Their little lives literally depend on their listening and following instinct.

Truth #1 – The sinister enemy lies in wait ready to attack the unsuspecting going about their daily lives. He often comes out of nowhere hitting us from behind. For the believer, he has no power but all the commotion, squawks and tiny claws are unnerving to say the least. The enemy can make a lot of noise but can do me no harm if my soul stays under the protective wings of God.

If you say, “The Lord is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent. Psalm 91:9-10

Truth #2 – God gently speaks into my heart to keep me close. It’s my job to listen and respond with my own little peeps following close behind and beside him. Other voices attempt to get my attention and lead me into danger. So, my little life literally depends on how well I listen, discern, and follow the voice of God.

but whoever listens to me will live in safety and be at ease, without fear of harm. Proverbs 1:33

One of my favorite verses in all of Scripture is Deuteronomy 30:20. It beautifully sums up these truths and the whole of the Christian life:

…love the LORD your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the LORD is your life….

Wonder of Wonders

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Once lit with festive Christmas lights, my neighborhood is now growing dark as lights are being taken down one yard at a time. There’s a little stab of sadness in the return to the plain and ordinary. It’s the loss of the wonder and mystery of Christmas that pains me. But I, too, will soon pack away the decorations and lights.

Wonder is so easily squelched by the routine, mundane, bizarre, and the tragic. This past year, nearly every vestige of it has been stomped out of us. But I want to keep it alive in my heart.

Wonder is the sense of awe that stirs the soul when magnificent truth beyond our capacity to comprehend is encountered. It sweeps over me when I experience the breathtaking mind-warping grandeur and majesty of God’s creation. As Job said, it causes the heart to pound and leap from its place. (Job 37:1)

I was a scuba diver in my younger days and water skied once. There’s a heart-pounding exhilaration in the spray and whipping wind as one zips over the water pulled by the power of a speeding boat, but the only wonder I experienced that day was the wonder of surviving. I much prefer the quiet depths of the water and the wonders beneath the surface.

Slipping into the depths of the holy Word of God, his Spirit stirs my heart with wonder as I ponder the breathtaking mind-warping magnificence of Truth. The greatest wonder that causes my heart to leap from its place is the unconditional, unwavering, inexhaustible love of God that embraces me just as I am in all my failures and leads me beyond them.

The Sovereign God who brings out the starry host one by one, and calls them each by name (Isaiah 40:26) died to save me from sin’s curse. Now he will never ever leave me, and every morning he calls me to follow him. Wonder of wonders.

What wondrous love is this, O my soul, O my soul!
What wondrous love is this, O my soul!
What wondrous love is this
That caused the Lord of bliss
To bear the dreadful curse for my soul, for my soul,
To bear the dreadful curse for my soul!

Shamar

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48 golden brown seeds have fallen out of a cone I picked up under a towering Sequoia on the grounds of Mount Angel Abbey recently. These little seeds, touched by the warm summer sun, will grow into something much much bigger if planted and watered. That’s what seeds do.

There are seeds of truth and untruth falling all around us these days. Sorting them out is tiring and confusing. Seeds grow into big things, and the health of my soul hangs on a discerning mind and sensitivity to the Spirit of God within me.

If planted, seeds of untruth will grow into doubt and uncertainty about God and the meaning of his words until the soul is adrift. This is nothing new. It started in Eden. The outcome was disastrous. Seeds of truth will grow into transforming faith that trusts in the goodness and sovereignty of God even when we don’t fully understand him or his ways. It anchors the soul through the storms and shifting winds.

Lately, I’ve become more keenly aware of the critical need to continually immerse my mind in the truth of God’s Word allowing it to root more deeply in my heart and become the fiber of my soul. In the last few weeks, I’ve been pressed to study the book of Deuteronomy and create a journal of the study. This verse was one of the first ones to reach out and grab me:

Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them. Deuteronomy 4:9

The phrase, “…be careful and watch yourselves closely” comes from one Hebrew word: Shamar. So, I’ve decided to title the journal “Shamar” as a reminder of this call to soul diligence and remembrance of God.

I’ve also decided to make this Shamar study available via email distribution. If you would like to join me and receive a somewhat weekly email with brief snippets of truth and reflections from Deuteronomy, please email me at pamjteschner@gmail.com or fill out the contact form on the new Shamar page on my website: https://pamteschner.com/Shamar/. Also, please forward this to anyone you think would be interested in this study.

“Each day as I walk with God and allow the Holy Spirit to reveal to me who God really is, the more my capacity grows in worshiping and adoring this God…As I move toward God, my capacity to understand God grows deeper and deeper.” A.W. Tozer

Smoky Prayer

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I’ve been praying this for many years, but it has taken on new meaning in the eerie smoky half light of these past few days.

I am yours, Lord.
All I am and all I have 
belongs to you.
I trust your great 
and tender love for me.
 
Holy Spirit, wash away all 
that is not of you,
And give me an undivided heart 
that beats for you.
Fill me and flood me with the
fullness of your life
and power and wonder.
 
Show me your unfathomable ways,
Teach me your unsearchable paths,
Guide me in your unshakeable 
Truth and teach me,
For you are God my Savior 
and my hope is in you 
all day long.

Over the years, God has used this prayer of surrender and hunger to change me, teach me and show himself to me. This week I’m praying it in a new “light.”

With forest fires raging to the north and south and evacuation levels studied, the frailty of life and things is brought into sharp focus. But the faithfulness and goodness of God pierces the darkest days. May this be your prayer every day in all circumstances.

P.S. My family and I are not in an evacuation area, yet. I pray for those of you who are in those areas and for those of you who have lost much.

Oregon Wildfires, 9/10/20 10:00 am, Linn County Sheriff

Why am I?

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There are times and seasons when we wonder why our personal set of genetic codes exist. I have been in such a season of reflection. Why am I?

I exist to live in a deeply personal relationship with the One who created me, redeemed me, and is alive within me in all the fullness of his divine life. That alone is staggering and more than enough for a lifetime. But it gets even more amazing.

Before time began, God planned and purposed you and me to do amazing stuff through all the seasons of our lives. He “shapes the precious life he saves and does so for a special purpose. The pattern starts to unfold — a pattern for which God has been shaping you as he takes you through a lifelong pursuit and to a treasured fulfillment of serving him well. God intends to help each one of us live with his design in mind and not to trample underfoot his exquisite workmanship. The design is beautiful. The promise is sure. The end result is profound. The answers will all be there. But the condition is clear: we must search for God with all our hearts.”[1]

Note the last line – “we must search for God with all our hearts.” We find our special purpose and gifting not by pursuing the gift but the Giver. Within him is the truth of who and why you are. Stay your heart upon him and guard against the insidious whispers of doubt that question and warp Truth.

He loves you fiercely, and has given you an extraordinary gift. The gift is very precious to him and tailor made for your unique set of genetic codes. May you “see the beauty and the marvel he had in mind when he created you.”1

What must he feel when I think I have so little and minimize it through comparisons? Have I trampled it under the foot of insecurity or doubt?  May what I do with what I’ve been given make his heart sing! And may I trust him to use it when and where and how it most pleases him and leave the end result in his hands.

[1] Zacharias, Ravi K. (2007) The Grand Weaver: How God Shapes Us Through the Events of Our Lives. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan.

Unalterable

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Fifteen years ago, my youngest son told me that he had enlisted in the army. Guessing my reaction, he waited to tell me until it was unalterable. When I realized there was nothing I could do to change it, I moaned that something terrible might happen. I’ll never forget his response, and I remember it every time he’s deployed. “I’m in God’s hands and He’s in control of what happens to me here and everywhere.” Although he didn’t quote Psalm 139, there were definitely echoes of it…“You hem me in behind and before, and lay your hand upon me…if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast…all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” He pulled the “spiritual card” on me, and it worked. How do you argue with that?? But, in 2005, it didn’t lessen the pain of watching him board the army bus and be taken away from me and eventually to the far side of the sea.

He was deployed to Afghanistan again this week. I’ve lost track of all of his deployments, and with every one there’s a place in me that’s uneasy and unsettled until he’s back. Yet, God meets me in that place with tender compassion, and asks me to trust His sovereign care. I can’t imagine the anxiety if I didn’t believe that God is absolutely sovereign and absolutely loving. There is an inexplicable peace that flows over the uneasiness because I know God is God, and He wrote the first day and last day of my son’s stories before they were conceived and carries them every day in between. That is unalterable Truth.

But I’m human. Sometimes it’s hard to trust. Sometimes fear wells up in my throat. Then I just lean into the great compassion and goodness of God and ask Him to help me trust Him more.

Wallowa Mountains. Photo by Pam Teschner